First off, VFFF has been updated… And with some awesome food, I must say. In case anyone is too lazy to click off their readers and get to my actual blog to see this stuff – feel free to check it out with a simple click, right from where you’re sitting:
Day 1 ~~~ Day 2 ~~~ Day 3 ~~~ Day 4 ~~~ Day 5 ~~~ Day 6 ~~~ Day 7
Day 8 ~~~ Day 9 ~~~ Day 10 ~~~ Day 11
And now, since I am in uber-limbo, unable to communicate in a timely fashion with The Man, and I’m unable to talk about any of the stuff I’m waiting to hear back about anyway… And because something came to my attention that I’ll address tomorrow…
I present the best in recent search terms!
“bestiality bitch meme” Wait, where? I wanna do it…
“i put my collar on her –poppin” Ha. Hahahahaha. Except now “poppin” is in my blog. Twice, actually. So that particular search will NEVER bring anyone here again. *wipes single tear*
“humanely sourced leather” If you find a way to slaughter an animal and rip off its skin in a way that is “marked or motivated by concern with the alleviation of suffering” you let me know. In fact, go experiment on your favorite pet, and report back on how that act displayed “evidence of moral and intellectual advancement.” Kthnx.
“andes mint parfait” (as well as “cant find mint parfait andes”) I KNEW my Christmas cookie post last year would come back to haunt me unsuspecting homemakers around the holidays… Wait. Jesus Christ. As of TOMORROW, I’ve been blogging for a year? WHEN THE FUCK DID THAT HAPPEN!?!
cpr short stories erotic resuscitation Here you were, innocently trying to find a hot short story about erotic cpr [Editor’s Note: Wait, seriously?], and you get one about a dead woman at my job, hey? Sorry I killed your boner, man.
omg im bored at work omg me too.
“master slave fantasy piss breasts dog cunt -mistress –gay” Does anyone else get these ADD searches and want to forcibly shove Ritalin down the person’s throat? Oh, that’s just me? Whatever, you’re all mean anyway!
“bdsm conquered princess slave” Mario. I thought instantly of Mario Bros.
“f” Yes. That’s all. The letter F. Deep.
For the record, “breath play” is ALWAYS my number one search. Always. I don’t even do breath play. Not that saying breath play a whole bunch here is going to help any, but… Still.
I think I’d prefer to have my top search as something bdsm related like ‘breath play’ as opposed to my consistently top search term: ‘retard’. And I’m wondering if ‘f’ is actually a person’s name like ‘o’…as in the story of…yeah…it’s a long shot, I know.
I’m loving your VFFF as always and you’re nearly done! Yay! One question, do they sell the chocolate tofu like mousse? I’m so intrigued. I’ve made mousse and pudding and all sorts of things from tofu, but we don’t have it on sale as anything other than ‘soft’, ‘hard’ or marinated. I think I have tofu envy.
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Chloe Reply:
December 4th, 2009 at 9:37 am
Yep, the tofu comes like that! They sell lots of kinds… I buy tofu from Nasoya and they have pre-cubed, silken, lite silken, soft, firm, lite firm, and extra firm. They also have what you saw in the picture, “silken creations” that come in vanilla, strawberry, and dark chocolate. They’re low fat (w/no saturated fat), vegan, cholesterol free, all natural – all that good stuff. You can use ‘em in recipes, desserts, smoothies… Or eat them like I do – right out of the plastic tub!
You can see a picture of them here!
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Breathplay is the number one term that brings people from your blog to mine. You made that one entry and BAM! Traffic.
Perverts.
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Chloe Reply:
December 4th, 2009 at 9:31 am
Yeah.. Everyone rocks up here (32% of searches, ffs) and realizes “Oh, this bitch is a loser – she doesn’t do it. Oh, but LOOK. She’s linked to someone who does! *click*”
I dunno why I put the *click* inside the quotes. Huh.
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Wow…that tofu looks great! Have I mentioned recently that Australia sucks because we have nuffin?
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Chloe Reply:
December 4th, 2009 at 4:14 pm
If it were shelf-stable, I would totally mail you some. Alas, it’s not. *sad*
And you guys have to be short SOMETHING over there. Because you DO have stuff… You have… Wait for it… Accents! OMG!ACCENTS to be precise. I’m jealous of all the Aussie accents.
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OMG. If you don’t make the VFFF-links open in the same window/tab, I’m gonna strangle you. No. I mean. Not for REAL. But I’m gonna make some really sick twisted people come to your blog looking for child incest dog scat. So there.
(I’ve no idea whose the incest is – is it sibling-dogs doing scatplay or is it sibling-children playing with sexy dog poo? Anyway. Eww.)
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Chloe Reply:
December 4th, 2009 at 4:12 pm
Oh man oh man oh man. Don’t think TOO hard about the incest! Ack!
Also.. I don’t know how to set the links. I don’t actually set them. I just tell the thingy where I want the link to go… You have to understand, I’m a computer IDIOT. An honest-to-goodness IDIOT.
I could have thought a new tab would be better though, no? I always thought it annoyed people when clicking on a link took you away from the page you were currently on…. No?
(See? I’m an idiot.)
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Beastiality bitch meme? I think they were looking for a FurAffinity alternative, since it’s down.
Clearly the second person did not want to read about collar-poppin’ douchebags.
If I had a pet cow, and it died because it was old/sick/ect, would the leather from that be considered humane?
Andes mint parfait? -drooool-
I now curse you with obama terrorist! (heeee)
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Chloe Reply:
December 4th, 2009 at 1:59 pm
Wait… FurAffinity? Whazat?
Also, in all seriousness, I can’t see myself using my pet’s body as a vending machine for personal desires. Like, oh, my dog had such nice fur, I think I’ll skin her and make myself a purse. Not because I NEED to, but just because I wanna. I just… *shudder* I can’t personally see how that would display evidence of moral and intellectual advancement. It seems to display evidence of being selfish.
And I am SO stoked to see the search terms this time around! Heh. Well done!
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FurAffinity is an art community for anthrocentric art (read: Furries, cartoon animals)
And it must be a cultural difference; While I see your point, I simply couldn’t let a body go to waste. Culturally, it just seems like it would be incredibly disrespectful (as a friend) to the animal’s spirit to just bury or burn it. Instead I’d try to figure out every possible way to utilize it, to ensure that the memory lasts longer. I’m talking about, it’s already dead and you can’t do anything about it. And fuuuuuuuuuck purses made of leather. The one I want is made of recycled tire rubber (waterproof! ecohappy!)
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Chloe Reply:
December 4th, 2009 at 3:53 pm
Oh. FurAffinity. Wow. I never got the furry thing. Now you and I have said furry like 8 times here, though, so I think people will show up more! Ha!
And… No, don’t get me wrong. NEED is different than WANT. If a pet died and you NEEDED a portion of his or her body for your survival, or your culture ensured that the people around you who saw the leather item would understood intrinsically how and why you were using the leather and that it was only from an animal who died of natural causes etc., I would totally understand!
I just think that situation is nearly impossible these days. Most necessity situations are eliminated by modern life. If you were in a plane and it crashed and you needed to hunt an animal for food? That’s okay because “I feel like it” is different from “my survival or well-being depends on it.” I just don’t see anyone who can afford to keep a cow strictly as a family pet would NEED the leather for any reason. Want, perhaps. Need? I doubt it. I don’t think it’s wasteful to allow a body to return to nature, to foster the growth of flowers and trees, and to provide nutrients for animals and insects that feed on decomposing bodies. I don’t see that as wasteful OR disrespectful. I think it’s very respectful of nature, actually.
I do think it’s wasteful to take an animal’s skin and not let it go back to the plants and animals in nature that would use it in a clean, environmentally friendly way, and instead increase the demand for the harsh, environmental poisons that are necessary for tanning animal hides.
Now, as far as the cultural impact. Like I said, if people saw it and knew “Oh, she must have had a pet die, and she is preserving its memory and respecting it by doing _____…” I suppose that makes sense to reinforce that cultural value. While I might not DO it, since I have no need (and, like I said, I don’t think it’s wasteful for an animal’s body to go back to feed nature) I could understand that. Totally.
However, I think today’s society makes that next to impossible. I don’t think anyone who saw the leather item would think it must be from a pet, and one that died naturally, and that it’s only to preserve the animal’s spirit. I sure wouldn’t. (And no one else I know!) Because that’s just not a common source of leather or reason for using it. Not at all. In fact, people would subconsciously get the message reinforced that the skin of a dead animal is omg!fashionable. Or necessary. It’s neither, and I wouldn’t want to reinforce that message, strictly out of respect for the dead pet cow’s brothers and sisters who may very well be raised for slaughter! That seems deeply disrespectful to the animal’s spirit, if the “humane” use of that animal’s skin actually reinforced truly inhumane acts on other animals to attain the same product, yanno?
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Wakaru. “Ah, the clouds have parted!” (That means I understand, and that you’ll get weirder search results!) I forgot about the harsh chemicals and such used for commercial tanning, since it’s one of the things I can, and prefer to do, myself if the case arises.
THIS CONVERSATION IS GETTING LONG, looks like independed blogpost time for me. (brb)
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Aaah. I can’t reply to your reply! You need a Webbitch, I tell you.
Personally, I’d rather leave the page I’m on and go where the link takes me (provided we’re still on the same domain, yanno?), than have four tabs with the same domain up. But, rather new tabs than new windows. I’m obsessive like that, more than six tabs and I’ll start to look for things to close. Sssh, don’t tell my M, he likes to keep some fifteen-twenty tabs open and uses four different browsers to never have to close one unnessecerily. Guess who edits? Ahem. Ahem.
Imma gonna go hide nao.
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Chloe Reply:
December 4th, 2009 at 7:27 pm
Zomg, I know – I need a webbitch SO SO SO badly. Where does one GET a webbitch? I must acquire one. Immediately. Sooner, if possible.
My computer died, and because I’m poor my mother just gave me her super-old laptop. It has, I kid you not, HALF a gig of ram. So I can’t run all that much at once. I always just have a couple tabs, two programs max. My computer would literally laugh at me as it crashed if I tried to have 15-20 tabs and four browsers open.
I need a new computer. *sigh*
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