Anyhow, I’m glad my comment was of some value to you. As to my correlation between submissiveness and grammar: I considered the fact that submissiveness in a relationship had little bearing on conformity to society, but I figured that was social conformity that was a non-consideration. I also figured, as you mention, that most of us would prefer to not be singled out as radically different from mainstream, and indeed would wish to be recognized for our similarities instead of singled out for out differences. Therefore, I consider that the desire to be able to communicate in a way that would be clear and accessible to both the BDSM community and the rest of the world at the same time would be preferable. The “submit to my partner but not submit to grammar rules” comparison was kind of a tangent that popped into my mind when I was trying to compose what I submitted.

Again, thanks for sharing; I enjoyed the reading.

I’ve grown quite attached to some of the smart, intuitive, introspective, wonderful people who comment here too. There are some really great people and really great thinkers in this little blogging circle.

An yep… There are a lot of… “Interesting” stories and such about submission and slavery and all that. I remember stumbling across quite a few that made me want to pour battery acid into my eyeballs. I sort of think of it as an analogy. Those stories are to the reality of BDSM as hardcore porn is to a normal sex life. Total insanity!

Interestingly, I once had a therapist who hit the nail right on the head with me, though I didn’t see it at the time. I was 18, and just… Ugh. miserable. After 12 weeks of therapy she diagnosed me by saying, “You’re too intelligent and too intuitive for your own good.” It was completely true. I don’t live the life I do because I’m too stupid to do it any other way, I live it because I’m smart enough to know that it’s what’s best for me. My intelligence and intuition and creativity and personality can thrive when I don’t have to worry about the traps I set for myself, because I have the boundaries of submission/slavery.

I’m so happy to see you exploring your feelings. No matter the outcome – it’s a positive practice and experience to look into yourself. (Btw, a new and really good blog by a woman (and sometimes her husband) who is doing some exploring of her own is by Jane Marie Dee. The address is http://janemariedee.blogspot.com/ and I really urge you to check it out if you haven’t already! She’s very articulate, fun, and open in her recent self-exploration. And I hope she doesn’t mind me promoting her here. Heh.)

I hope to see you around!

~Chloe

Thank you
~~C

I’m not certain I’m following you on the submitting to grammar rules, though… It’s interesting, but strikes me as a bit of a semantic argument. Most people seeking submission are not seeking conformity to society – I don’t think they see those things as synonymous. Especially since our lifestyle is a bit “out there” when it comes to the rest of society. (That truth pains me a bit – I wish it were more acceptable and mainstream.) For me, I “submit” to grammar rules because I have a reverence for communication. It is THE strengthening core of my relationship – all my relationships, in fact – and I strive to increase the efficacy of my communication skills whenever and wherever possible. I have a problem with muddling my words and my message, especially when I’m crafting something for public consumption. The startling, stuttering effect things like “W/we” has on the written word is damaging to the essence and the message. And, for ME, it does not reinforce submissive feelings. It reinforces feeling a lack of clarity, and an effort to withdraw from the “rest of the world” rather than try to integrate and promote acceptance. I think it’s counterproductive to talk like that because it highlights differences, rather than similarities and MY purpose in blogging is to say “Hi, I might be a bit different, but let me show you who I am, and maybe you can see similarities, rather than differences.”

I dunno if I’m getting there, but I’m trying. And thank you, for this comment… It’s helped me remember my goals with a bit more clarity. Hope to see you around!

Secondly, I want to tell you that you’re not alone.

Finally, I wanted to suggest an additional counterpoint which occurred to me: How can one expect to be perceived as a perfectly submissive when one can’t even submit to basic grammar rules. Isn’t the intentional breaking of grammar rules itself an expression of an individualistic desire to rebel against authority. It’s iconoclastic, even. “I’m going to rebel against authority to show how dedicated I am to the principles of submission!” Seriously?

Good for you!

I love knowing I’m not alone. I read your post on the improper use of “I” and “me” and I felt right at home. I didn’t comment though, because… Well, I only checked out your blog briefly, but it appears to be VERY un-BDSM (it’s focused on a game, yeah?) So I didn’t think a link back to me would be all that appreciated. But even if I’m not over there, know that I’m really happy you’re here!

Thank you for the comment! I really love your blog and I’m so happy to see you in mine.

While I do think my Master cares how I write, in terms of my clarity and content (to a degree), I don’t think he would have deep feelings either way if it were incredibly important to me to write lowercase i’s or something. But I have to admit… I was scared that after I posted this, just to mess with me for coming across as slightly uppity, Antonio would tell me I had to write like that for some period of time. And, of course, I’d do it.

And then there I’d be, with (lowercase) egg all over my face. So far, I’m in the clear…

~Chloe